Doubt

     
It's in seeking my path that I err.  

I've come to see that life is an unfolding.  Most of my struggle has been in delaying the unfolding by constantly searching for where I should be.  I am where I need to be.

Too many times I search instead of living, I avoid experiencing where I am, to find where I should be.  This is wrong.

I want God in my life, but I don't listen for his instruction.  I seek his wisdom and blessing, but I am not available for his instruction on how to get it.  It is as if I want God to make make my desires reality and be a wishing well or a genie to grant what I seek.

I am growing and understanding that this is not what he does.  This is not how I relate.  My job is to have faith and trust in the Lord.  My job is to fight doubt and work today where I am.

I trust that the Lord will guide me.  I trust that the Lord is right.

It is through his Son Jesus Christ that I am released from my doubt, I am released from my sin.

I was baptized years ago, my body was washed, but my heart was not touched.  I listened in church and could remember the words, but I did not let the Spirit into my heart.  It was fear, it was doubt that kept it out.

Watch and protect yourself from doubt, it is the kindling of fear and uncertainty.